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How to tell a weed from a not weed: If the deer won’t eat it, it’s a weed (some exceptions); if the deer have eaten it, it’s a not weed (no exceptions). If the deer have eaten it, it might as well be a weed now.

Some things deer don’t eat:

Buttercups. Oh you with your cheery little faces. And roots cemented in place. You are well built up, but can’t you just stay in one place? That’s not in the garden? Or the lawn?

Forget-me-nots. How could anyone forget you? You don’t give us a chance! Plowing through the garden, staging your own little coup d’etat, obliterating everything in your path. Except the buttercups.

Lemon verbena. Yes, you smell good. But really? Grow where you’re planted, and stay out of the shasta daisies. And the azaleas. And the rudbeckia bed. And the rhododendrons. And the ferns. And the…